The past couple of years have had me really questioning life. Everything I've ever known has been questioned over this time period. People have been taken out of my life, I've lost passion for the things I grew to love, and now I find myself asking the question, "What was all of it for?" Is there a purpose for heartbreak, let downs, or unanswered questions that have presented themselves?
People say our life is already mapped out for us by the time we're born. I must slightly disagree with that statement. I believe we're given many routes to take in life, however, they all end up at the same finishing point. I do believe in destiny, but there's more than one way to reach that destiny. As for myself, I think I've taken every possible route and find myself at a crossroads trying to figure out where to go now.
In September I lost my grandmother. That was by far the hardest time of my life. All of the rejections, letdowns, and negative experiences couldn't sum up to the pain I felt the day she passed. Little did I know that period of time would begin a metamorphosis in my life. Everything started changing. Why? I guess it was just a matter of me developing a different perspective on life. Little did I know, it would begin to effect the people around me. That change of perspective could be a huge contributor to me being at the crossroads.
While going with the flow with this newly developed outlook on life, I was still trying to maintain an old perspective just to keep a friendship. Eventually I would lose it. Maintaining two different philosophies on life is impossible. It showed and cost me one of the better friendships I had ever had. Thankfully, I had my core group of friends to rely on during this time. True friends are had to come by, therefore I cherish the ones I have now.
By this point you probably want to know what this new outlook on life is. It's simple...I question everything. Relationships, religion, trust in people, and life itself. We get so narrow minded and complacent with our thinking that when things change, we get hurt. Constantly questioning things has helped me develop a sense of awareness to everything. Will I still experience grief over a lost loved one or the every day emotions? Yes, it's part of our genetic makeup. But, constantly questioning things has strengthened my mind and especially my heart.
I've met some people over the past several months that have helped me go about this life philosophy the right way. One of the most important things they've taught me is that life can never truly be figured out. That's why we should have an inquisitive approach to everything, but remain true to our values. Life throws curveballs and fastballs that hit us right in the face.(Philosophical baseball pun) We just have to continue on and accept it. Don't try to figure life out, just live it with an outlook of a three year old. Let everything be new to you, question it, and don't get complacent.
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